May 08, 2012


Change has gone from something that was a big part of my life, to something that nearly defines my life.  Just about the time I can walk through my home in the dark without bumping into anything, it is time to move again.  Just about the time Daniel can define his job in clear terms, it is time for him to get a new position.  Just about the time I figure out what makes Brave tick, he outgrows his pants again and starts getting moody at dinnertime and I'm like, "Who are you and where did all my parenting experience go?"

Though, I'm pretty sure I know why he is getting moody at dinnertime.  It's probably for the same reason that I am having a hard time sleeping again, and Zion's nails are chewed to bleeding nubs, and Daniel's productivity is through the roof: everything is about to change, and every fiber of our beings can feel it.  Jubilee is clingier, Bright is trickier, and the very moon itself seems to be shaking nervously in the night sky.

I mean, forget the fact that we are about to move to a new apartment in a new city and Daniel is starting a new job.  Before any of that happens, we will take Jubilee to a country where she has never been, introducing her to an aunt, three uncles, and three cousins for the first time.  We will be living in a house that had Sue Sue in it when we last saw it, and two dogs running around outside of it, and MoMo sleeping in her room upstairs.

Boy, have things changed.

We will make a trip to Kansas City to see our People Group, as Bright calls them.  Two baby boys, Asher and Luke, have been born to that group since we last got together, and two little girls have been brought in via adoption, Bethany and Jubilee.  One family has converted to a vegan lifestyle, one family had to go through the tragic death of a brother, and John has started writing a book.  We always knew he would.

In St. Louis we will crash with some East Asia friends and get a short glimpse of their new life in America.  I can't believe David is done with his first year of law school, but I can believe that he knocked it out of the park.  We always knew he could.

In Michigan we will meet my brothers' new girlfriends.  It would seem they both found keepers at the same time.  When it rains it pours!  My mom says I will adore them both.  I will give my grandma a huge hug.  The last time I saw her she was recovering from cancer treatments and I honestly didn't know if she would make it until the summer of 2012.  G0D saw fit to give me more time with her, for which I am incredibly grateful.  My Uncle Dick, too, is still surviving his cancer, and will be getting a huge hug from me!  My Aunt Cindy and I have become closer over the past couple of years, bonding over email as we've swapped recipes and tales of health challenges and stories about people we both love.  I can't WAIT to see my lifelong girlfriends and hold their cute new babies!  We will laugh and eat and laugh some more.  We might cry a bit, too, of course.  We will tell each other, "You haven't aged a day!" and, "I LOVE how you're wearing your hair these days."  We will be proud of each other for the women we have become, in spite of everything, or maybe because of everything. 

Who knows what will transpire between now and our next trip to America.  Who knows the middle-of-the-night phone calls we will receive across the miles that will bring us to our knees. 

But what we do know is that we worship a G0D who is the same yesterday, today, and tomorrow.  The same G0D who created Saturn and all of its more than 22 moons (we studied Saturn today in home school), created my Uncle Dick and knew he would suffer from Leukemia.  That same G0D knew that my kids would have to wait until Heaven to play with their cousin, Glory.  Some folks take G0D's sovereignty in light of tragedy and pain as proof that He is not wholly good.  I couldn't disagree more.  I take great comfort in knowing that someone is directing the show, even if it is gritty and sad and R rated.  I respect the One who has to land this plane, while we all yell at Him about the turbulence and complain about the lack of leg room and the temperature of the chicken teryaki.

What I'm saying is, He is as ready as we are to get this thing on the ground, and leave this difficult flight behind us.  He is ready for all things to be made new - THE ULTIMATE CHANGE - and it is just a matter of time before everything is right for that to happen.  Until then, we will curse our crows feet and watch our husbands' hairlines receed (well, not mine, but he got PawPaw's hair), and we will press onward with the hope we have in the Everlasting,



G0D above all gods.