June 30, 2013

bothering to date

Dating is trouble.  It's trouble when you're a teenager, it's trouble in college, and even in this age of eHarmony and the like, it's trouble for adults.  It's trouble for the parents of teenagers, trouble for dorm-mothers, trouble for the dumped and trouble for the dumpers.  In fact, the owners of Sonic drive-thru restaurants, and the founders of eHarmony, might be the only ones on the planet who looooove dating.

But I'm not actually talking about dating in that sense.  I'm talking about dating after the wedding; the importance of wives dating their husbands.

The thing is, dating in this sense is still trouble.  There's the trouble of arranging a sitter, for one thing.  The trouble of getting her to the house, making sure there is kid-friendly/sitter-friendly food on the table, and making sure the hand-towel in the guest bath isn't soaking wet because Heaven forbid the sitter goes home and tells her parents that we are slobs. 

And then there's the trouble of primping for the date.  Sure, we could just throw on our sneakers and head out the door, peanut butter stains on our shirt and all, but our husbands are worth more than that.  They married a cute thing in capris in the early years of the new millennium, and they deserve now to date a semi-cute thing in a maxi skirt who has bothered to shave her legs and wash behind her ears.  There are just some things men will always need, and a pleasant-smelling date is one of them.

But that's not all.  Husbands need their wives to be present on the date.  That means putting that load of laundry (the one you forgot to load into the dryer) out of your mind.  Smile, listen, and ask him about work.  Ask him what he had for lunch (you can bet his female co-workers know the answer to this one).  You might even learn something new about him, or you might get a glimpse of what he hopes for in the coming decade.  You might remember what color his eyes are, or you might notice that he still laughs the way he did when you met.

In my eleven years as a wife, I've learned that there's a phrase more important than, "Stop and smell the flowers."  And that is, "Stop and date your husband."

It's worth the trouble!