March 06, 2014


If you thought some of my other posts were brutally honest, get ready for this one.

Recently I have fallen in love with this blog, which is written by and for women serving overseas. Every Friday, Velvet Ashes posts a prompt to which we are encouraged to respond. The prompt today is "fear." We are to share our greatest fear with all of you, without a contrived hopeful conclusion.

So here goes.

Deep breath.

I am terrified of having a prodigal.

I'm scared that all of this scripture memorization and long talks about the gospel, the Phil Vischer movies, the morning devotions, the fact that we are raising them "in the field," will come to nothing - or worse yet, backfire - and I'll be sitting across from a scowling atheist and his mouthy girlfriend every Thanksgiving for the rest of my life!

My greatest fear is that my kids will abandon the faith of their youth and live as the world lives: unruly, bitter, unhappy, and confused.

Can I guarantee this won't be? No I cannot, and neither can anyone else.

So there you have it, my greatest fear, raw and bleeding and dangling in your face.

And here you have a picture of me without makeup, with my best "What You See is What You Get" face on, because if we're going to do this "being real" thing, then let's do it all the way.