August 10, 2011

introducing love

Jubilee can not remember what love feels like.  She was 6 days old the last time she felt it.  You and I cannot fathom not knowing the feeling of love.  Everyday we feel it, from our spouses, from our kids, from our friends, from our G0D; and if all else fails, we can call our mums and get a good dose of the stuff, anytime night or day.

Two friends wrote me the same sentiment yesterday.  On my Facebook wall, Sarah V.  wrote, "Praying for G0D to prepare your daughter for an overflow of love."  Then in my gmail inbox, Amy H., who has two adopted children, wrote, "When love takes this little one in, she might not know what to do with it." 

"Get ready," G0D seems to be saying, "for the messy business of introducing love to the loveless."

I guess He knows what He is talking about, since He has spent thousands of years doing that very thing.  Interesting how we, too, don't often know what to do with it.

There is little I can do to adequately prepare for what will likely take place on Monday.  I've read books (which are mostly nay-saying, I regret to report) and I've consulted friends who have walked this road before us, and I've prayed and I've searched my heart to weed out the fears that have no place there.  But really, as Daniel pointed out yesterday, its best not to peer over the edge of the diving platform too long.  "One good look, to get your bearings," he said, "and then just dive."

So here we go.  The biggest leap of faith we have ever taken.  I really like what Amy wrote later in her email.  "Before too long," she wrote, "you will wonder, 'What if we had missed out on this?'"  What a sweet note to end on this morning, as I wrap up this post and call the kids in for a day of home school; and really, what a good way to look at life (and love) at large.